Late night shopping

I decided to go shopping for a DSL modem last night about 11:30pm. Yeah, it was late, but I had it to do.
So off I go to that giant retailer with the name starting with a "W". It was a small town, so it should be safe, right? I notice I'm getting some looks as I park in front of the store by a couple of police officers and several citizens. Before I could get into the store I realized I showed up in the middle of a dispute the police were trying to sort out. More people were still showing up and adding to the problem.
Back to shopping. I found the electronics department and asked the employee with the badge if he could direct me to a DSL modem. So he, some shopper he was visiting with, and myself all move where he leads us. He stops in front of the Nintendo DS cabinet and says "it's all right here." OK, so I start explaining the difference in DS Gaming and DSL internet. I quickly realized from the blanks stares that I was on my own and excused myself. But they truly wanted to help and would not leave.
I quickly started searching others aisles and I could hear the other shopper saying "he wants a motor?" The employee said "no, he wants a modem." Shopper says "what the ____ is that?"
Well, I finally found a modem. Only one in the store. The employee said he was thinking about getting hooked up to the internet some day. He then apologized for not being more help and then admitted he was just a stocker.
Back in the parking lot, there were a lot more onlookers. This is a small town and people need a story to tell I guess. I got in my truck to leave. People looked at me like they were thinking "why would you leave all this."
I had a modem to hook up ...